Cheating

Okay, so while I am able to come up with something interesting to talk about every day, I can't always find the time to do so. So, you can expect (starting with this post here) to be lied to: I am going to change the timestamp on some entries to suit when I would've submitted them, instead of when they're actually written.

That said, Thursday's post would go something like this:

This morning, Jess and I drove the babies out to Winter Springs to a yoga studio. There was a mom & baby class for Calina and I that was pretty entertaining. I learned some cool stretches for her, and got some exercise for myself... without feeling selfconscious about her whining and crying in what should be a peaceful place - all the babies fussed a little. And they all ended up nursing at the same time. Totally weird nursing party!

Jess & Jho went to a mom & toddler free-for-all, with some singing, but mostly just a huge, almost baby-proofed open room with toys spread everywhere. Could've been cool if the moms weren't quite such gripey gripesters, but... they're all home with babies all the time without adult interaction - it seemed like a good way for them to unwind, rather than a cool super-interactive guided playtime.

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I am part of a craniosynostosis support message board, something that really helped me get through Calina's surgery, and indeed helped me decide what sort of surgery to do (we went with the less invasive endoscopic surgery, opting for our misery to be spread out over a long time, with helmet therapy for as long as 12 months...). The problem with the board is that there are so many mothers on there who are very vocal about how they came to decide on the MORE invasive surgery; more often than not their doctors either don't do the endo surgery and/or convinced them somehow that the endo surgery was inferior.

The endoscopic surgery is the "new" development, and it's only good for a small percentage of cases with the same condition. There are a lot of special requirements for the kids who can take advantage of the new technique -- but we absolutely decided that if Calina were a good candidate, that we wanted the best new technology possible.

There are doctors out there, however, (without naming names) who have made a name for themselves poo-poohing the endo procedure, claiming all sorts of inferiority, and how much more reliable and safe the "open" procedure is... that is, cutting the entire scalp from one ear across to the other, and reshaping the skull all at once.

And many of the mothers on this board are very vocal about how they opted for this procedure over the endoscopic one... I think it's really sad to imagine that people who have the option for their child could be going with the endo but are scared away by horror stories -- so I have to be an advocate for it! There are new moms coming into the board every day asking the same questions I asked when I first came to it: Pros and Cons for CVR (open) vs. Endoscopic.

The hard part is not getting into it too much with these moms who've been sold on the fact that the open procedure is "better" and are adamant about it, while still advocating my decision. I could've easily been swayed the other way... and if later someone incinuated that I made the wrong choice, I would lose my mind being defensive.

They are, after all, making a slightly harder choice... endo is allegedly the "safer, more gentle" option that some of them have actually opted out of... which HAS to be a really hard choice for any mom to make -- and I am sure they will knock down, drag out, fight to defend that decision. But I really feel like it's my responsibility to help other moms through the process, like I was helped (with even more info).